Pantagraph.com Weather forecast, local radar and more
NewsWednesday, September 26, 2007 6:08 PM CDT
Comments Comments (36) | E-mail this page E-mail this page | Print this page Print this page | Enlarge type Enlarge type | Reduce type Reduce type | Search archives Search archives | RSS RSS feeds | Add to My Yahoo! Add to My Yahoo!
Counselor: Returning troops need support, kind words
By Paul Swiech
pswiech@pantagraph.com
Advertisement

BLOOMINGTON — We appreciate what you did for our country and we’re here for you. That’s what family members and friends should say to members of the Bloomington-based 33rd Military Police Battalion, who return to Bloomington-Normal Thursday after spending about a year in Iraq.

“Regardless of what they did, saw or experienced, they were over there,” said Lynn Willard, a licensed clinical professional counselor and licensed clinical social worker who works with people who have experienced trauma. Even if a soldier didn’t experience an ambush or battle personally, he or she knows someone who did, so the first soldier may experience vicarious or secondary trauma, Willard said.

It is important for returning soldiers to process what they experienced, said Willard, executive director of Normal-based ABC Counseling & Family Services and an American Red Cross of the Heartland mental health volunteer.

“An important reason to try to remember what happened to you is to decrease the fear associated with the traumatic event,” Willard explained. “But you need to confront the memory in a safe environment with a supportive spouse or counselor.

“Processing memories helps you to integrate them into your past,” she said. “Trying to avoid memories of trauma keeps those memories in your present.” Trauma that isn’t processed could lead to pain, fear, rage, depression, shame, self blame and survivor’s guilt.

But it’s up to returning soldiers when they share their experience, Willard said.

“Don’t say ‘So tell us what happened over there.’ If they’re not ready to talk about it, that puts them in an awkward position. Instead, say ‘I’m here for you if you want to talk about what you experienced over there. I will listen.’”

If a returning soldier is ready to share his or her trauma at a time that isn’t good for the spouse, the spouse needs to say that. If the spouse is in the midst of a crisis, she or he wouldn’t provide good support at that time, Willard said.

If that happens, the returning soldier should seek professional counseling. Involve children only if they are old enough to process what they hear. Young children don’t need to hear the trauma because they need to feel safe and need to understand that their parents are safe.

Returning soldiers continuing to experience problems and spouses experiencing vicarious trauma need help from a professional counselor, Willard said. Warning signs include sleep problems, outbursts of anger, difficulty concentrating, excessive worry, an exaggerated startle response, memories you can’t get out of your head, and thinking you’re back in the war. These problems could lead to accidents, job loss, broken relationships and illness.

The Heartland chapter of the Red Cross will have 10 professional counselors, who are Red Cross volunteers, meet with families of returning soldiers Thursday to assess family needs and to make referrals if further help is needed, said Lyn Hruska, Heartland chapter executive director.

Take a look
LaTonya Harris, Family Affairs Liason for the Illinois Army National Guard hugged a member of the 33rd Military Police Battalion before his departure to Chicago and Iraq in June 2006.
Video
Most commented stories
Browse online archives
Recent issues:
Reader comments on this story - 36 total

Note: All views and opinions expressed in reader comments are solely those of the individual submitting the comment, and not those of the Pantagraph or its staff.

Soldier wrote on Sep 27, 2007 8:38 PM:

" It makes me proud to see that you have the ability to voice so many different opinions. You have the ability to disagree because there are Americans that are willing to defend that right. Welcome these Soldiers home and the next time you see any veteran think about the freedom they help guarantee for all of us OR protest their return... that is the beauty of being an American. Either way you honor those Soldiers by demonstrating your freedom to do so, that is why they exist. "

Kite wrote on Sep 27, 2007 6:45 PM:

" Ah, what does a pencil-twirling social worker know, anyway. "

To Army Mom wrote on Sep 27, 2007 2:17 PM:

" I think most of the comments are awesome. You need to quit picking out the comments that aren't and focus on the positive ones. Don't make yourself sick about it! "

You are right about VietNam wrote on Sep 27, 2007 2:15 PM:

" I feel bad for my husband when I read this. He was a Viet Nam War vet and nothing at all was done. What a sad situation. Nothing like what is done for the troups returning home now. I'm thankful that things are so much better for them as far as understanding. "

John wrote on Sep 27, 2007 12:12 PM:

" To all returning solders and solders still serving over seas....Thank you! "

Vet's Wife wrote on Sep 27, 2007 10:00 AM:

" Don't forget it's important to let them talk when THEY are ready. Let them know you are there when they are ready, no pressure and then always be ready to listen. Don't ask questions, don't pry, just be there for them. Be grateful they're home and don't drag them all over town and to friends' enjoy your down time at home. WELCOME HOME TROOPS! "

Grateful one wrote on Sep 27, 2007 8:51 AM:

" You know, if we pray for the will of God to be done on earth as it is in heaven, we must know that God is in control and that he can turn the hearts of men in any way He chooses for His ultimate purpose. These precious men and women in the service are to be honored and respected for all they do, and we must remember that God's will is being done thru them and our President. Instead of murmering, PRAY for our country!! "

More Appreciation wrote on Sep 27, 2007 8:29 AM:

" We are so glad you are home. No matter anyones opinion of this war, know your work on behave of our country is appreciated more then most of you will ever know. Relax and best wishes in returning to your day to day lives. Special welcome home to Kimberly from El Paso from her mail carrier and his wife. "

Good Job, Guards wrote on Sep 27, 2007 6:30 AM:

" Historically every American miliatary event has had its dissenters. That does not negate the individual & joint sacrifices of the soldiers & their families. Welcome home, Troops, Welcome home! God bless you all. P.S. All nay-sayers: you make me ashamed of what it means to be an American. I do not support the Iraq war, but since it does exist I support our troops & their families. "

wow wrote on Sep 27, 2007 2:23 AM:

" you all seem to have the same post..but I ask you, why not honor all vets?? what about those that give up 7-10 yrs. of thier lives ? put thier lives on the lline but never really had to? its a chance of those who did have taken .. and god bless them.. but i ask you, is'nt it fair to give them all the same reception?? lets not turn this into something that america is so friggin proud of..wake up people everyone wants to kill us.. "

From a local household wrote on Sep 26, 2007 11:10 PM:

" made up of 2 Dads and 2 children... Welcome home and much gratitude and appreciation for protecting Americans and the American way of life. We owe our freedoms and liberty to you! "

DA wrote on Sep 26, 2007 10:54 PM:

" Thank you will never be enough to say to the men and women who keep us free. Despite how you feel about the man (and congress) who sent them there they are true heroes!! We need to treat those who protect our freedoms like royalty. Thank you all who served now and in the past God Bless you Welcome HOME "

armymom wrote on Sep 26, 2007 10:54 PM:

" I'm so sorry to hear the dissention here, although it is not a surprise to me. These people risked their lives, no matter what job they did, to give you the freedom to write your ridiculous comments. My son is facing his third tour in Iraq and I am so proud of him and all the military. Thanks to all of you for your service and a big WESOME HOME!!! "

Todd the Bod wrote on Sep 26, 2007 10:48 PM:

" People should be able to say whatever they want. This article is dumb. "

me wrote on Sep 26, 2007 10:25 PM:

" i want to thank the troops for all that they have done. I would love to have the opertunity to watch them in the parade with my 2 year old son. he already has a great respect for our troops and the flag. he knows that you stand and do not wear a hat when the flag is passed by. I thank all of the troops for my son to have the ability to grow up and be free to do what he wants. I hope someday he will be in the service as well. He will have all of my honor if he choices to do so. "

To: Fatty wrote on Sep 26, 2007 10:08 PM:

" If you haven't put on a pair of boots yourself then SHUT UP!!!! How do you know that they didn't see things or weren't invovled with different operations. I am sick and tired of people making stupid comments like you, especially if you have never had the courage to stand up and fight for your own freedom let alone every one else!!! EITHER STAND UP OR SHUT UP!!! "

NO wrote on Sep 26, 2007 9:27 PM:

" They went over there and killed people that didn't need to be killed. We invaded Iraq for no reason, and the soldiers went along with it, even after they knew that we went to war on false premises. I know they couldn't really back out of it without having their lives ruined, so I don't really blame them, but I am NOT going to say thank you. They did what they had to do to survive, and that's fine, but it's not some great thing they did, and many of them know it. It is what it is. And now they have to deal with it. I wish them a good recovery. "

Fatty wrote on Sep 26, 2007 8:59 PM:

" Yes, lets supply counselors and support. They were in non-combat positions. They must have been traumatized. Yes, lets provide counselors. Give me a break. These NG's probably barely got their boots soiled. "

Welcome Home! wrote on Sep 26, 2007 8:48 PM:

" welcome home soldiers! I'm sure your families are happy to have you home again, and we are all proud of you!! "

The best troop support wrote on Sep 26, 2007 7:19 PM:

" The best support for our troops is to pressure Congress to bring them home...now. Cut off funding for any Iraq operations. Everybody should show up and be holding a big sign that reads "Thank you for serving, Now Congress, Bring The Rest Home." "

Proud to be an American wrote on Sep 26, 2007 7:10 PM:

" It is sad that the schools are counting it as an unexcused absence for kids to miss school to be there to show appreciation for what these men and women have done for us. I don't care - excused or unexcused - my child and I will be there to help give these troops the hero welcome they deserve!!!! "

I am the very proud wrote on Sep 26, 2007 5:57 PM:

" sister of a man who did a tour in Viet Nam in 68 with the army. I also have a nephew who did a tour in the Gulf war with the Navy and a niece who's been to Bagdad TWICE with the Army reserve. Our son is presently in the Airforce, even though his dad is an army vet. I know very well the worry families go through when a member is in a war situation. These men and women deserve a HUGE welcome home with open arms for what they and their families have endured. WELCOME HOME GUYS AND GALS. WE ARE VERY PROUD OF ALL OF YOU. "

TO Greed wrote on Sep 26, 2007 5:23 PM:

" What kind of question is that, "If I show up to support the troops am I supporting the liar that sent them over there to begin with?" These brave men and women are coming home heroes! No matter what you think of war, you need to respect these people! They volunteered to do a job you clearly are not wanting to do... If I'm wrong you strap a gun to your back, and risk your life for this country and our freedoms!!! That's exactly what these soldiers did. Soldiers, from the bottom of my heart thank you!!! Please enjoy being home with friends, family, and loved ones!! "

To Greed! wrote on Sep 26, 2007 5:10 PM:

" Then are you saying that the soldiers that are being sent over there have a choice then! They do not have a choice to go to war. They are putting their lives on the line for us so that alone deserves your attendance!!!!!!!! Regardless of "who" sent them over there and what you think of him!!!! "

To: Greed wrote on Sep 26, 2007 4:57 PM:

" Don't worry, it is possible to support our troops without simultaneously supporting the oozing bag of slime we loosely call our President. Our troops signed up to help us and our country, unfortunately none of them figured they'd wind up in the middle of a >blank< measuring contest. We should love and support our troops because of what they stand for, especially since so many had to die and watch their friends die for our President's own selfish needs. They'd probably do it again if they thought it would help our country, and we gotta love them for that. "

To: Greed wrote on Sep 26, 2007 4:51 PM:

" No, you are not. Support the men and women that risked their lives for us. They didn't ask to be sent - they just followed orders! Welcome back all! "

Greed wrote on Sep 26, 2007 4:08 PM:

" If I show up to support the troops am I supporting the liar that sent them over there to begin with? "

Military Disarmenent Bill wrote on Sep 26, 2007 3:49 PM:

" The Military Disarmanent Legislation is in the Senate today, thanks to a yea voice vote by the House of Representatives. This piece of work will disallow any veteran that has been diagnosed with Post Dramatic Distress to own a gun. It will allow for formaly private medical records to open to discovery. Further this legislation will ban kids diagnosed with ADT. What a way to welcome home the veterans. The congress stinks and we should all call them everyday and tell them so. QUIT DESTROYING OUT BILL OF RIGHTS AND OUR CONSTITUTION! "

Anyone? wrote on Sep 26, 2007 3:33 PM:

" Know when their parade is? I heard it's going down Main St.. "

Welcome home wrote on Sep 26, 2007 3:31 PM:

" to all of you have served for all of us Americans. Your hard work and dedication is greatly appreciated. Thank you for everything!!! "

hummm wrote on Sep 26, 2007 2:57 PM:

" vietnam vets were walked on "

to These men and women wrote on Sep 26, 2007 2:55 PM:

" could you have copied that any better ? "

These men and women wrote on Sep 26, 2007 2:12 PM:

" Will be different. They will need support in more ways than just listening. Do not push them to process what they went through over there too quickly and do not think that just because they look like they are handling being back well, that they really are. It is not easy for them to talk about their experiences, ESPECIALLY to their spouses. Spouses need to respect that and also may need help in knowing how to deal with their returning soldier. He/She may not want to lean on you, not because they don't care but because they don't want you to carry what they have to carry. Spouses, try to remember that, give them time and space to get back into the groove. It is a hard transition for everyone. Good luck and God Bless you all....Welcome home and congratulations for getting your loved ones back! "

Thank you! wrote on Sep 26, 2007 2:06 PM:

" Thanks for all you have given and all you have sacrificed! We should all be so brave as to fight for our freedom! Welcome home! "

May I be among the first... wrote on Sep 26, 2007 1:30 PM:

" ...to say, "We appreciate what you did for our country and we’re here for you!" Thank you, thank you, thank you! We're happy you're home safe! "

Soldier GF wrote on Sep 26, 2007 1:27 PM:

" I'm glad to hear that the soldiers have returned home. It is so important that these returning soldiers get the love and support they need. It's not an easy time for these men and women coming back here to the US, so be sure to say thank you if you see a soldier. No matter how you feel about the war, or the president, remember to be thankful of what our troops do for us. "
Add your own comments

Please read the rules before posting comments.

You must be logged in to leave comments.
If you don't have a member ID, please register.

*Member ID:
*Password:
Remember login?
(requires cookies)
  Forgot Your Password?
 
Lee Enterprises Customer Service | 301 W. Washington St., PO Box 2907, Bloomington, IL 61701-2907 | Ph. 309-829-9000 | 800-747-7323
Copyright © 2008, Pantagraph Publishing Co. and Lee Enterprises. All rights reserved. | Terms of Use | Privacy Policy