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Our February listings, as offered by the readers and your own resident Lite Boy:

Funniest exhibition of sad emotion

In an amazing turnaround season for the Chicago Bears, fans were flying high their team yard flags this season. Then, the Bears lost in the playoffs on a last-second field goal try that bounced twice off the goal post in what was a stunningly disappointing end. That, in turn, led one homeowner (at Clearwater Avenue and Sunshine Court in Bloomington) to enter a period of respect, but also mourning.

The homeowners lowered their Bears flag to half-staff.

Most above-and-beyond 'service'

Being a mayor is not easy and never-ending, but LeRoy’s mayor, Steve Dean, surely bumped the ceiling on call of duty when on that recent 22-degree-below zero day, he posted on his Facebook page: “LeRoyans: Anyone in desperate need of anything? The van started; I have lots of layers to wear, and can run to the store.”

As one later posted: “Only in a small town does the mayor make a house call.”

Top headline

As it appeared on the Chicago Sun-Times website, after a production of “Hamilton” was canceled due to the recent cold:

“Brrrr Kills Hamilton Again”

It was Aaron Burr, of course, who shot and killed Alexander Hamilton in their famous 1804 duel.

Latest legal 'breakthrough'

Perhaps it's in the name of a law firm in Bradenton, Fla.:

"ASAP Divorce"

More Fun Places To Visit, If Only For Their Names

As offered by the readers:

  • Sweet Lips, Tenn.
  • Hot Coffee, Miss.
  • Hole-In-The-Wall, Wyo.
  • Bacon, Ind. (just eight miles from Hogtown, Ind.)
  • Chocolate Springs, Texas

Most fittingly broken street sign

It surely has to be the one knocked down during a recent snow/wind storm, in Normal at the corner of Fort Jesse Road and — yes — Bent Court.

Most other ironic casualty of a winter storm

Postponed recently, due to snow and wind, was a performance at the Bloomington Center for Performing Arts of ... Dave Rudolf's Beach Party.

The cancellation was logical and, at that wintry moment, sadly missed, too.

Latest greatest obituary

It might have to be the notice of Frances Irene Williams, of Louisville, Ky., who died recently at age 87, a “spirited” woman who lamented to family that her frustration over President Trump was killing her.

Thus, when she died and her family turned in her death notice to her hometown paper (the Louisville Courier-Journal), they ended it — “Her passing was sadly hastened by her continued frustration with the Trump administration.”

(We might add: the line was deleted by editors at the newspaper, but the backlash on Facebook was so intense, the paper later offered a public apology.)

Best Name Club

  • Michael Horn. He's the guy at United Center in suburban Rosemont who blows the horn to signal goals at Chicago Blackhawks' games.
  • Douglas Fears. He's the latest U.S. Homeland Security adviser, named by President Trump.
  • Ben Jealous. He’s a columnist for "Democracy In America."
  • Land Tawney. President of Backcountry Hunters and Anglers, a public land and water conservation group.
  • Nikki Fried. She’s Florida’s agriculture commissioner who just hired her state’s very first "cannabis director."

Another great team nickname predicament

Move over Normal Community High Ironmen, where girls’ teams can awkwardly become the “Ironmen girls” … in Carlsbad, N.M., home of the famed Carlsbad Caverns, teams at the town's high school are the Cavemen and the "Cavemen women” or occasionally “Cavegirls.”

Most inspired door greeting 

On one recent wintry evening outside Lucca Grill, the legendary downtown Bloomington pub, the pizza chefs had a few moments to create their own snowman, using some of their own pizza toppings, to greet diners as they walked past a ledge next to the door.

Best Name Club, business division

Miles Chevrolet. It's a dealership in Decatur.

Newest unfortunate hyphenation

In a recent wire story about 6-foot-7, 285-pound Duke University basketball phenom Zion Williamson — his nickname is "Hulk" — the line break in the story listed him as the “6-foot-(next line)7,285-pound Zion Williamson.”

Not that he might not actually seem that big …

Our February board of contributors: Cherilyn Sytar, Jerry Grandon, Craig Lutes, Ruthie Cobb, Dawn Riordan, Cliff Carney and Jonell Kehias, Bloomington; Dave Hawkinson, Bradenton, Fla.; Lee Templeton, Palmview, Texas; Sue Boerner, Cathy Ferme and Lenore Sobota, Normal; Nancy Clayton, Colfax; Jay Pfister, El Paso.

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