Our January listings, as offered by the readers and your own resident Flick Lite Boy:
On the outdoor sign at a CVS in East Peoria, the “P” in “PHARMACY” has burned out so that, in a coincidental twist, it's now a “HARMACY.”
Most unusual January plea
In a winter season that, until this weekend, has seen no snowman-like weather for two months, suddenly last week — well after the holidays — in Normal's Ironwood subdivision appeared an anonymously-placed, wooden snowman carrying a sign with a special plea/offer — "Will Work For Snow."
Presto! From the looks of the area after Saturday's snow event, it appears it worked ... and now the snow men get to work.
Latest great license plate
Spotted on car in Bloomington: "N DA RUF"
Only a golfer would understand.
January Best Name Club
- Emily Wines. She’s a lead wine steward at Cooper’s Hawk Winery & Restaurants, one of which is in Springfield.
- Larry Sprinkle. He's on the weather team at WCNC in Charlotte, N.C.
- James Steel. He’s chief metals analyst for the worldwide financial services company, HSCB.
- Linus Graves. In 1856, he founded Bloomington’s Evergreen Cemetery and was part of the latest Evergreen Cemetery Walk.
Asked a McDonald's worker to a motorist ordering via the microphone in the drive-through lane: "Will that be to go?"
As the motorist later said, "I bet that was a drive-through-lane trainee."
Top sign winner
As it appears on a wall at the Community Cancer Center in Normal, in a lab where they draw blood:
"Relationships are like algebra ... ever look at your X and wonder Y?"
Latest irony in the news
Actor Geoffrey Rush has been accused, according to a news story, of “joyously dancing naked in front of an actress in their dressing room, making 'playful' faces at her and spying on her with a mirror as she showered" between performances of a recent off-Broadway play.
Name of the play: “Diary of a Madman.”
More Fun Places To Visit, If Only For Their Names
As offered by the readers:
- Lovelock, Nev.
- Mount Healthy, Ohio
- Filbert #2, Pa.
- Slapout, Okla.
- Ty Ty, Ga.
Most festively amusing neighborhood
Along Bloomington's southeast side, it has to be Brookridge subdivision, especially around the holidays.
Three Christmases ago, after one homeowner got a new toilet and put the old one on the curb for pickup (in those days, bulk pickup in Bloomington was every other week), the toilet sat there for awhile.
In time, all in good humor as the Christmas season began, neighbors began decorating the toilet, first with a red bow and then green, at one point even adorning it with a sign that read, “Santa — Please Stop Here!”
"It turned out to be one of our most fun Christmas adventures ever," said one Brookridge neighbor.
And so along came October 2018 when there was a water main issue that was quickly repaired, but left a rectangular hole in the street for a road-patch crew to complete.
On came Halloween. Then Thanksgiving. Then the Christmas season.
Thus, in the finest time-honored heritage of the Brookridge neighborhood, those around began decorating the two saw horses that surrounded the hole with bows, ornaments and wreaths in a festive salute. Someone else draped festive chains.
Merry Christmas hilarity and fun!
Just can’t be great at everything
As appeared the line in the recent obituary notice of Michelle White, of Normal:
“She was talented … except at cooking.”
Newest kind of athletic competition
As read the headline above an Associated Press story:
"Gymnast Fights Through Kidney
Stones at World Championships"
Latest idea that really wasn't
Appearing on the outside marquee at an Arby's in Bloomington:
"CURY FRIES ON A SANDWICH?"
What? A new delectable Indian-style side dish, wondered passersby? Day later, the sign was corrected to read "curly" instead.
Got an item for Lite? Send them by email to firstname.lastname@example.org or post via the Bill Flick page on Facebook.
Our January board of contributors: Michelle Soukup, Stephanie Soukup, Bill Arbogast and Roger Hughes, Normal; Sam Harrod, Eureka; Dave Hawkinson, Girard; Jackie L. Wright, Washington; Alan Holt, Howard Hill, Doug Reynolds, Judy Adelman, Bob Bradley, Ruthie Cobb, Marilou Carls, Bloomington; Lee Templeton, Palmview, Texas.